Through change this past year of my life, I moved from fear of the unknown to comfort in the destiny God places before me. Moments of spiritual distance were still spent in prayer, holding on to the knowledge that God is always with me.
The acute and painful reality of the end to a ten-year relationship, and the role I played in the demise of our marriage brought me to my knees. I reflect on the affect of a hardened heart from my distant past, lack of attention to the one who deserved it most, and the harm I can cause when I placed importance on so many things before my life partner.
I recall this section of Matthew Kelly’s Seven Levels of Intimacy:
Nothing makes sense anymore for these couples because they have lost sight of the essential purpose of their relationship. In many cases, they were never consciously aware of this great purpose. They may have enjoyed a mutual pleasure or some common interests, but their relationship never matured to include the great ambition of extraordinary relationships – the pursuit of our essential purpose.
Intimacy is not just physical, nor is it just emotional. Intimacy is multidimentional. It mysteriously combines all four aspects of the human person: the physical; the emotional; the intellectual; and the spiritual. It is therefore important to understand intimacy as it affects and is affected by each of the four aspects of the human person.
I vow to never commit to a life partner without the foundation of essential purpose. And the Divorce Rebuilding Group I participated in at a local church leaves me eternally grateful for love, hope, and guidance. We are continuing to meet for ongoing friendship and strength guided by God’s essential purpose in our lives.
My friend Ken is traveling to Peru next week for a spiritual retreat in the Jungle. I will admit, I am a bit jealous and I began to reminisce about time spent in Peru. My experiences with the people and land were yet another major change agent in the last year of my life. I view life, people, love, and purpose differently than I did before I traveled. The depth of the human experience founded from my relationships with the people I love in Peru sets the bar high for future relationships. I seek connections with people who share the common desire to experience humanity above all else. Is that not why we are here anyway? Nothing nourishes my soul more than a sincere and profound connection with another person. Cars, clothes, houses, paint colors for the kitchen, ad nauseam, cannot feed me and make me whole. I am most interested in what you and I become, not what we do or say.
When I place God as primary in my life, darkness has proven to provide me with stronger light.
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